In 1964 the Civil Rights Act was signed into law. In 1964 my parents were ages ten and twelve. I was not even a dream to them I am sure! In some ways it seems long ago but in reality it was only forty-five years ago. This was only forty-five years ago. Less than a half a century ago there was a large part of the population that believed blacks and whites should not share bathrooms, water fountains or restaurants.

Introduced... more

I was asked a question recently, and, as I answered it, I realized that I hadn't ever thought of it before. But it was a good question, and one worth pondering by all adoptive parents.

Was adopting transracially something that came naturally to you?

Ever since I was 13, the picture in my head of my child - my daughter - was a little redheaded, blue-eyed Russian girl. It's not like I was going to ask the Russian Consulate for that specifically. That was just what I saw.

When it became clear that Russia was not going to work out because... more

We went to a nearby downtown shopping district to buy shoes and have dinner. We walked around a bit after our meal, and Jack was drawn to a large fountain in the middle of a square. At first, we were the only ones there. Then, an apparent family of six appeared on the opposite side of the fountain. Two white parents, two white boys, and two Asian girls. I wanted so much to ask if the girls were adopted. I don't know many adoptive families nearby, you see. Plus, I love talking about adoption. However, I realize that not everyone shares my openness and enthusiasm.

All that... more

I'm a musical theatre geek. I have thousands of showtunes in my iTunes library. One of these shows is Avenue Q, which, despite the fact that it includes puppets, is not suitable for children. Or some adults. One of the uncomfortable-because-it's-true songs is titled "Everyone's a Little Bit Racist". One of the verses proclaims:

Everyone's a little bit racist Sometimes. Doesn't mean we go Around committing hate crimes. Look around and you will find No one's really color blind. Maybe it's a fact We all should face Everyone... more

I was recently contacted by Tribute Books with a great opportunity - to interview Andrea Nepa, adoptive mom and author of Red in the Flower Bed: An Illustrated Children's Story about Interracial Adoption. I read the book and asked Andrea a few questions.

Andrea Nepa and her husband adopted their daughter Leah from Vietnam in 2001. Although she is a dietician, she took on the challenge of writing and illustrating a children's book for her daughter.... more

Mita and I were at our first joint counseling session (Mita's first ever)the other day. We were playing an emotions game. We took turns drawing a card with an emotion written on it and a facial description of the emotion and then we all shared of a time when we felt that emotion. Mita did great at it. One of the emotions picked was Surprise.

When it got to Mita's turn to share she said she was surprised when she came to the U.S. that not everyone looked like her, or where not "brown" is how she put it. In all of my preparation for the adoption of my brown kids, did I think to prepare her for all the "peach" people she was going to be around. We spent two weeks in Ethiopia... more

My oldest girls are aged nine. Meg is actually going to be ten in a few short months. When I think of puberty, I think I get the normal heavy gut feeling that most parents have. This post could actually be written in for many different categories. In fact I may expand on the effects of puberty with older child adoptions, international adoptions and Ethiopian adoptions in the future.

Right now, though, I have been thinking a lot lately on how to raise two black children through puberty as a white mom. There is a small part of me that says just go with the... more

I am the mother of a son. And my son has dolls. He likes his "babies" and has decided that when he grows up, he is going to be a Daddy. He will have five babies and will put them to sleep in cribs. He will take them to the grocery store in car seats. So yes, I do think boys can and should play with dolls.

I collected dolls and stuffed animals as a child, and my son's room is full of them. In addition to the 5 white Cabbage Patch Kids, for Jack's first Adoption Day, we added a black Cabbage Patch Newborn. The following Christmas we got "the twins" - two brown dolls from the... more

In the past two weeks I have read one book and seen two movies with the same recurring themes of transracial, non-traditional families and of loss and the importance of a mother's love. I have also attended a conference on the Neuroscience of the neonates and how vital mother's are for an infant's development. It seems I attract all of these topics now that I have become a mother of a transracial adoptive family!

Last month I reviewed The Help,... more

Today was Enu's seventh birthday! We had a great time. She handled all the stimulation and cake and ice cream well, and was so pleased with her gifts and her guests as well as the amazing party her mom threw her (patting myself on the back here!)

One of my favorite things that happened today was one of the cards she received. Her friend gave her a gorgeous little girl's card with a brown mermaid on the front! I asked the little girls mom where she found it and she said "WalMart".

I had found my card for Enu there as well, in the Ebony section of Hallmark... more