On one of the email groups I am on, there are some pretty heated discussion regarding race and transracial adoptions right now. One of the group members shared a website, which was full of people against transracial adoption (among other things) and the things that they had to say were so disgusting that I refuse to even summarize. Then another person shared a website about “angry adult adoptees” that were also against transracial adoption who had some equally disturbing things to say (disturbing from a transracial parent’s point of view anyway).

So that sparked a conversation on the list on how concerning it is to know that there are people out there that hate our families because... more

This article, “Why is race still a factor in adoption?” was recently brought to my attention.

The story was recently published in the Philadelphia Inquirer and tells a heartbreaking story about a three year-old African American foster child named Kevin, who had been living with the same foster couple for two years. The couple, who are the only mom and dad that Kevin can remember, were planning on adopting him. Oh, and they are white.

Without warning, county officials and police entered the home and removed the child, who of course was crying and scared. He was placed with another family, of who little... more

On one of my email lists, an adoptive parent who already has one Asian child, voiced concerns about now adopting an African-American child. Her concern was that her Asian daughter gets a great deal of attention when out in public for being “beautiful”, and she was worried that society in general does not see African-American children as attractive, and she did not want her black child to grow up feeling less beautiful than her Asian child. The woman was worried about one child feeling inferior to another because of racial issues.

I think what the real issue here is, is the sort of “hierarchy” that seems to exist in the adoption world. White kids are the top tier. Asian, Hispanic or... more

This article ran on the front page of the New York Times on April 12. The article discusses how modern technology has made it possible for the average person to purchase a DNA kit for approximately $100 that will tell them what their racial genetic make up is and where their ancestors are from.

My first thought, was that it was really interesting. I thought about how for someone that was adopted and did not have much or any information on their birth family, ancestors, etc. that it could be a very... more

This article is currently on the New York Times website. It is titled “Adopted in China, Seeking Identity in America” and was written by Lynette Clemetson.

The article is written about adoptees from China, but easily applies to any transracially adopted child and family. It focuses on children adopted from China who are now teenagers, and how this first group of current-day adopted children are handling issues of race and culture.

The article states, “As the oldest of the adopted children move through their teenage years, they are beginning — independently and with a mix of enthusiasm... more

In the podcast that I recently wrote about, the speaker makes an analogy of children adopted transracially to the story of the “Ugly Duckling”.

My first reaction was a bit of displeasure at the idea of my children being “ugly ducklings”, but as I listened to her expand her thoughts, I did really like what she had to say and appreciated the idea of using this well-known story to make a point.

Most people know the story of the ugly duckling. It was written by Hans Christian... more

Here is a great post by Debi Stevens on the Older Parent Adoption Blog.

Debi tackles something that I think a lot of people wonder about. Is it ok, or more importantly, who do many people think it is ok, for members of a racial minority to use racial slurs, that are derogatory to that racial minority???

Debi asked for people to speak out, so here are my thoughts on the topic.

We all know and fully understand that if, say for example, a white person were to use “the N word” in regards to a black man, that it would be exceedingly wrong, rude, hurtful, hateful and multiple... more

While I was doing some research online tonight I found an article about a documentary title “Outside Looking In”. The film was made by an African American filmmaker, who was adopted by a white family in the 1970’s, when transracial adoption, especially that of black children to white families, was still fairly rare.

Phil Bertelsen follows his own adoption and life story in the film, as well as several other story lines involving transracial adoption, including a white mid-western couple and the black birthmother they are making an adoption plan with. Through the film, Bertelsen gives a 30-year history on transracial adoption in America.

This article, http://www.adoptivefamilies.com/articles.php?aid=290,... more

I am going to share this because it is one of my most favorite annecdotes regarding my kids and race. Some background...my son "R" is my bio son, and my daughter "D" is African American and was adopted at age 6 domestically. R and D are in the same class as school...both in second grade now.

Last year, they were both in first grade and D was still a fairly new addition to the family. One day the kids had a substitute teacher. She was reading the role and saw the name DH and saw a little black girl, and then saw the name RH and saw a little blonde boy. Then she noticed them playing together all day and interacting lots. Finally, curiousity got the better of her and she pulled... more

Is love color blind? Does color matter? These are some hot topics when it comes to transracial adoption.Many people that say, "Color doesn't matter...love is colorblind". And while it is a lovely idea, I do not believe that is is a realistic or healthy attitude for adoptive parents to have. To be honest, color DOES matter. It matters to your extended family, it matters to your community, it matters to people you see in Walmart, and most importantly, it matters to your adopted child.

Color matters because it is part of that child's identity. It is part of who they are. Two of my daughters are my children, they are equal members of our family and they are many other things, but they... more