One of the comments I get in regards to my family more often than any other is, "I don't know how you do it." Well the thing is, truth be told, I don't. At least I don't do it by myself. I look at my life and it works as well as it does, because Josh and I work together so well.

So today, in honor of Love Thursday, I am dedicating this post to Josh, my husband of eleven years, my very best friend, and an incredible dad to eleven children. I say eleven kids already, because even though Solomon is not home yet, he is very much already in our hearts and a part of our family.... more

Yesterday my Benjamin Bekalu turned seven years old. I have been doing a lot of thinking about him and his life this week, and I have been thinking a lot about how much he has changed in the past year and a half.

For one, I have been thinking about how strange it is to not really know your child's birth day. As is common in Ethiopia, a place where birthdays are rarely celebrated and important dates and records are rarely recorded, our son does not know when he was born. In fact, his grandmother and sisters did not know when he was born. It seems... more

You do not hear a whole lot of talk about adoption and marriage. Usually when there are discussions on email groups or forums about adoption and marriage, they revolve around one spouse being ready and committed to adopting and the other spouse being reluctant to adopt, or not ready to do adopt.

But marriage is, or at least should be, a big part of adoption (when you are dealing with a married couple). Single parents can skip... more

The Fourth of July is a holiday with new meaning for me since we adopted transracially and internationally. Before, it was always a fun day of family, friends, barbecue, parades and fireworks. It was our country's birthday. I have always been proud to be an American, and yet at the same time I think it was something that I took for granted.

Now that I have four children who were born in other countries, I have many mixed emotions on the Fourth of July. Of course I am still proud to be an American and enjoy the day to celebrate our country and all of the many... more

Happy Father's Day everybody.

I have always loved Father's Day. When I was young, I enjoyed it because I have such a wonderful, loving and devoted father. For a good part of my life he has been my only parent and he has always deserved at least one day a year to celebrate his role as a dad, even if it meant burnt toaster waffles and microwaved coffee in bed.

And then I got married, and watched the man I love become a dad for the first time. I have since had two amazing men to celebrate on Father's Day.

Dads in adoption... more

Happy Mother’s Day everyone. Mother’s Day has always been an emotional day for me. When I was younger it was a difficult day for me because my mother was not involved in my life, and it was always sad to me to feel like “everyone” had a mom to celebrate except for me (which I now know was far from true).

Then as I became a mom, it became a day that I enjoyed. At first I really enjoyed Mother’s Day simply because it celebrates who and what I am in my heart. I am a mom. I believe that one of the biggest reasons I am here on this earth is to be a mom and to raise children. I treasure that.

As my children got older, I started to enjoy Mother’s Day with them. I cherish my hand-painted... more

Large transracial adoptive families are often criticized and questioned as to their ability to truly provide for more than your average 1.7 kids. Many countries do not allow international adoptions to large families, and many states in the U.S. do not allow larger families to adopt from foster care. USCIS often gives larger families a difficult time with immigration approvals. I have heard that some think that large families are basically "small institutions." It can all be very frustrating to a mom of a large adoptive family.

Let me tell you that with most of the large families I know, the parents are just as good, if not better parents than the families I know with only one or two... more

A reader recently pointed out an article to me from the New York Newsday newspaper titled, "Adoptive Couples Revel in the joys of big families brought together by love-and by will-if not by birth."

The article takes a look at several Long Island, NY couples that have created larger-than-normal families through multiple transracial adoptions.

The article discusses the declining number of biological children in typical households in the United States, as well as the increasing number of transracial adoptions and the impact that the increasing number of transracial... more

I thought that a Love Thursday post would be the perfect way to start off my posts on the blessings and “good things” about transracial adoption.

I have already dedicated a Love Thursday post to sisters, so today, I am going to dedicate one to brothers.

One of the most wonderful things I have gotten to experience as a result of our large, transracial family, has been witnessing the... more

Choosing to adopt transracially is a big deal. It is complicated and emotional, and requires research, education, devotion and commitment. As I have written about here and here, deciding to adopt transracially is often complicated by the issues involved and the nature of the process.

Now I am going to discuss another situation that can make choosing to adopt transracially challenging. That is when one parent wants to adopt and the other does not, or just is not ready.

On blogs, adoption... more