In my last two posts I have discussed the fear of adoption scams, and a recent article showing how ugly things can be when families put their money and trust into unethical agencies.

Here are some tips to avoid being scammed…

-Research, Research and Research! Look into agencies and programs. Talk to references (those provided by the agencies and those that are not). Join email lists and talk to parents that have used a variety of agencies. Find out why the happy families are happy, and why the dissatisfied or... more

In my last post, I discussed the fear of being scammed in adoption. The reality is that adoptive parents are vulnerable people, and orphaned children are also highly vulnerable. There is a lot of money involved in adoption. It is easy to see, if you take a step back, how easily someone could take advantage of such a situation for the sake of money.

It is easy to think that all people working in adoption are in it for the children, and truly want to help orphans find families. It is easy to think that all adoption agencies and the people working in them are full of good works and good intentions, and yet,... more

Another of the many fears of prospective adoptive parents that can often turn into an adoption barrier, is the fear of being “swindled” by an adoption agency.

I remember when we first started our very first adoption, and planned on adopting a baby girl from Vietnam. One of the reactions we got early on from family members was along the lines of, “What if the agency takes all your money and you never get a baby?”

I have heard this fear repeated over and over, and it is a legitimate one. For many adoptive parents, and many parents considering adoption, money is a huge issue and worry. For the average adoptive... more

In my last two posts I have written about fears that some adoptive parents have about their adoption travel, and then gave some tips on making your adoption trip less intimidating.

In this post, I am going to give suggestions to make it easier to leave children at home while you travel for your adoption.

-Try to keep things in perspective. Your children at home... more

Today I am discussing the adoption roadblock of travel worries and fears, and in this post I am going to give you some tips to help ease your anxiety about your adoption trip and offer ways to make it smoother and easier, and in my next post, I will write about tips to make is as painless as possible to leave children at home while you travel.

Tips for smoother adoption travel (and ways to calm your fears)…

-When you are early on in the adoption stage and still... more

Knowing the warning signs for attachment difficulty and weak attachment is a good thing, but knowing strategies to improve your child’s attachment is just as important. Here are some tips.

-Have as much physical contact as possible. Carry a baby or toddler in a carrier. Rock children of all ages in your lap in a rocking chair. Consider co-sleeping with your child, at least in the beginning. With older kids, try hair brushing, back rubbing, rubbing lotion on arms and legs, playing games... more

In this post I started discussing fears regarding attachment and bonding that many adoptive parents have. Now I am going to discuss risk factors for attachment problems in children.

There are several known risk-factors that can make a child more likely to have attachment difficulties, and many of them occur frequently in the lives of children available for adoption.

Some of the risk factors for attachment problems are...

- one or more changes in caretaker... more

Continuing on in the thread of barriers to adoptions and concerns related to adopting…

I have already written about the worries that many prospective adoptive parents have about being able to love an adopted child “the same” as they would love a child that they gave birth to (you can read those posts here and here if you missed them).

Today I am going to write... more

Continued from here...

Perspective adoptive parents should educate themselves on different health issues and conditions common in adopted children and get a good idea of what they feel they can or cannot handle, what risks they can and cannot take and then be open and honest with their social workers and adoption agency. On one hand no parent should ever feel pressure to adopt a child that they do not feel 100% comfortable in accepting and yet on the other hand, no child... more

Continued from here...

I would highly recommend all perspective adoptive families to have a conversation about what special needs they may or may not be willing to handle very early on in their adoption. While there are some parents who decide that they are only open to a “healthy” child, or one without any known health conditions or needs, there are also parents that purposefully choose to adopt children with known health conditions.

“Special needs” can be anything from... more