Today’s post is brought to you by the letter “O”, and I am going to write about adopting older children and about older parents adopting.

Older Children – These are the kind of numbers that are impossible to accurately calculate, but a large percentage of all adoptive parents want to adopt a baby, often a baby as young as possible.

At the same time, while there are millions of orphaned babies in the world, the overwhelming majority of orphaned children who are available for adoption are not babies. Many people instantly think of the challenges involved with adopting an older child when the topic of older child adoption arises, and it is true that adopting older children presents unique challenges. It is also has some pretty great rewards.

First, let’s take a look at the challenges. Unlike a very young baby, older children come to their new parents and families with a significant history and past. They have had good and bad experiences, they have expectations and fears, they have likes and dislikes and they have strong opinions on life in general.

Bonding and attachment can be slower with older children, as there is a lot of “getting to know you” that must go on. Depending on the child’s history, attachment can also be very difficult, especially if they have not had reliable adults in their lives before, or if they have suffered through abuse or neglect.

However, there are also wonderful rewards and benefits to older child adoption. Older children are able to communicate right away (if there is not a language barrier), so feelings can be discussed. Older children are able to interact with parents and siblings right away, and participate in family activities, which is great for bonding.

With older child adoption, parents have the opportunity to get to know about their child’s personality to some degree before the adoption, and there can be less “unknowns” regarding the health of the child, when compared to adopting a young infant.

Parents choosing to adopt an older child should be able to be flexible, be happy with small improvements and not have high expectations in the beginning. They should also be able to handle rejection, misbehaviors, etc. without taking it too personally.


Adopting an older child is not a decision to be made lightly, and is one that adoptive parents should put a lot of thought, prayer and research into before making. There are distinct challenges to adopting an older child, and yet the rewards can be equally wonderful.

There are millions of older children, both in the United States and all over the world, who have no one to belong to. Finding homes for older children is often very difficult for adoption agencies and programs, and while parents line up to wait for little babies, older children wait and wait to be chosen. I encourage adoptive parents who feel they may have the heart for older child adoption to consider it.

For us, adopting older children has been a wonderful blessing. Read my next post for our personal experiences with older child adoption.

More reading on older child adoption:


Older Child Adoption page at Adoption.com
Older Child Adoption Blog