In my last post in my Transracial Adoption ABCs I started discussing language in domestically adopted children. In this post I will look at language in internationally adopted children.

Language - Now when you adopt internationally, you are almost always dealing with a child that has grown up speaking a language other than English. If you imagine for a moment what it would be like to be brought to a whole new country where no one spoke English, and no one could understand what you were trying to say, you can imagine how frustrating, overwhelming and scary it can be for internationally adopted children in their early days home.

The good news is that most kids are like sponges when it comes to language, and are able to “suck up” and learn English very quickly. When a child is completely surrounded by and immersed in a new language they have little choice than to catch on, and kids are usually much better at learning a new language than adults are.

With our international adoptions, we have found it to be very helpful for us to learn some basic “kid phrases” in our child’s first language before they come home, to help with communication in the early days together.

Being able to tell your child basic things like yes, no, come here, stop, sit down, bed time, etc. is very helpful, and being able to ask basic questions about the bathroom, hunger and eating, sleep, pain, etc. is also very valuable.

Many international adoption agencies provide their adopting families with lists of such words and phrases in the language of the country you are adopting from, and purchasing a basic phrase book can also be useful.

For helping children learn English, there are many fun and effective ways. Picture dictionaries and “word books” are good ways to build vocabulary, and sitting together and reading a book is a great bonding activity.

Basic sign language aimed at children can also be very helpful for parents and children (hearing or not) to communicate when speech is limited for whatever reason. Older children may enjoy vocabulary flash cards and word games.

I know that some parents have had luck getting some ESL resources from their school district or from a homeschool supply store to use with their newly adopted children as well.

Television, especially children’s shows, can also be an effective way of helping your child learn English, although you need to be careful with what you have them watch and learn! One of Belane’s favorite phrases has been, “Oh maaaaaaaaaaaaaan”, courtesy of Swiper the Fox on Dora. :)

I have found that in our family that our kids have often learned English just by interacting with us, and especially with their siblings and other kids. Kids naturally want to copy each other, and they tend to be more outgoing around kids than they are with adults, and more likely to “try out” their new English skills.

While many adoptive families hope to have their child retain their first language, it is most common for adopted children to lose their first language as they learn English. The exceptions to this seem to be older children who have someone to continue speaking their first language with (such as another older, adopted sibling) and children who already knew some English and were therefore already bilingual.

Many adoptive families find teaching adopted children the language of their first country to be a good and fun way to help them learn about their culture and heritage. This can be done through books, tapes, culture schools and private tutors.


Since communicating with your child is so essential to building love, trust, bonds and attachment, I encourage all adoptive parents to put effort into bettering communication with your new child. Without language it is very difficult for children to express the loss, grief, fears, excitement, confusion, happiness and other emotions they are likely feeling in a new home and family.

Learning some of your child’s first language, finding tools to help them learn English and spending time getting to know each other are all ways to improve communication and help your child learn a new language.

Resources –

Here is a post I wrote about language in newly adopted toddlers.

A Parent and Teacher’s Guide to Bilingualism - This book has lots of resources for children who speak two different languages, and has specific information and suggestions for adopted children.