In this post I started discussing fears regarding attachment and bonding that many adoptive parents have. Now I am going to discuss risk factors for attachment problems in children.

There are several known risk-factors that can make a child more likely to have attachment difficulties, and many of them occur frequently in the lives of children available for adoption.

Some of the risk factors for attachment problems are...

- one or more changes in caretaker while the child is young

-one or more changes in where the child lives while young

-abuse and/or neglect

- frequent illnesses, and/or repeated or extended hospitalizations

- being in an environment without individual attention and nurturing for the child.

Children available for adoption will typically have at least three changes of care giver in a relatively short period of time. They will go from their birth mother to an orphanage or foster home, to their adoptive parent. Sometimes there are several other moves and changes in caregiver in that time as well.

Children in orphanage settings may or may not receive the attention and nurturing that they need to develop healthy attachment. In some countries the orphanages are overcrowded with children and understaffed, and children sit in cribs with little to no personal attention. In other countries, the child to caregiver ratios are quite good, and children get as much love and attention as is possible in an orphanage setting.

Parents heading in to an adoption should educate themselves on the risk factors in a child’s early life that could lead to attachment issues later on, and then learn as much as possible about the early life of the child they are considering adopting.

And yet knowing the risk-factors for attachment problems and your child's history are not always true predictors of how they will attach to you (or not). Our sweet Belane has a history of abuse, neglect, loss and multiple moves in a very short period of time...red flag after red flag in regards to attachment, but she was one of the easiest children we've had in regards to bonding and attaching. She accepted me as her mom right away and seemed ready and waiting for me to fill that void in her life. She went from an anxious attachment to a healthy attachment very quickly. She has amazed me with her capacity to love and trust after all she has been through.

Resiliency is one of the biggest things in my opinion that will determine how a child will do despite their history. Some children are very resilient by nature, and some are not. Children from very difficult backgrounds can go on to build healthy attachments in new families, and children with very minimal risk factors can develop significant attachment issues.

This would explain why you can look at 100 baby girls adopted from China, all being abandoned in the first few weeks of life, all living in the same orphanage for roughly the same amount of time and all being adopted at roughly the same age...and in that group, you will have some that attach quickly and easily to new parents, some that grieve and have attachment issues early on but over time build healthy bonds and attachments, and one or more that end up with true attachment disorders.

Along with understanding the risk factors, parents should also develop a basic understanding of the signs of poor attachment and those of healthy attachment, so they know what to look for as they begin to parent their child.

For example…eye contact is a very good sign, while a child that avoids eye contact is showing poor attachment. A child that snuggles into your body and relaxes in your arms to feed or be rocked is showing a healthy attachment sign, while a child that is stiff in your arms, pushes against your or resists being held is showing a sign of poor attachment. Extreme separation anxiety or the complete opposite…having no fear at all of strangers and being willing to walk off with anyone at anytime… are also both warning signs of weak/poor attachment.

Knowing the warning signs for weak attachment is a good thing, but knowing strategies to improve your child’s attachment is just as important.

In my next post, which you can find here, I will discuss tips for strengthening attachment and resources for finding more information.