It has been a sad couple of days for me…my Belane has started sleeping in her own bed…alone…happily.

Earlier in the month I wrote a six-part series on sleep and adopted children. Here is what I wrote at the end of the last post about Belane…

She has now been home for just over two months and I think she is doing great. Over the next few weeks I will gradually cut back the time I spend laying with her at night until she is going to sleep like everyone else. When she is sleeping all night without waking up anxiously checking for me, then I will know she is ready to sleep in her own bed, and we will make the transition. I am sort of hoping it isn’t too soon though, as I love crawling into bed at night with her snuggled up against me or Josh, and I cherish feeling that little arm wrapped around my neck.

Well…the last few weeks I have been starting to think that she was ready to sleep in her own bed. She is going down happily and easily for naps and at bedtime with just a few hugs, kisses and “I love you’s”, and she hasn’t been waking up at all during the night. Instead of crying when she wakes up and finds me gone, she just calls for me or gets up and finds me.

She has been a lot more secure in her attachment to me… she is very relaxed and happy now instead of anxious. She has been very healthy and thriving in every way.

She likes her bed, room, stuffed animals, blankets, etc. and has been napping there happily.

I started to think about how it has been three months since Josh and I have slept together alone in our bed…

So I told her on Monday night that she was going to go “night nights” in Belane’s bed, and instead of crying or protesting, she said “O.k. Belane, no crying.” I wasn’t totally sure she would really go to bed down in her room without crying, but when it was time for bed she took her medicine and brushed teeth and then we headed down stairs, and she didn’t show any signs of being upset. She got into her bed and snuggled in and got lots of loves…she told me again, “Belane, no crying. Night nights all done, me say, ‘Mom!’ and Mom come.” And I reinforced that yes, she could call me and I would come and get her in the morning or if she needed me sooner. I said goodnight and left the room and waited for tears….nothing.

I told myself that if she cried going to sleep or in the middle of the night then it would mean that she wasn’t ready, and we would try it again in a month or so.

I sat upstairs with the baby monitor in my lap…almost wishing she would cry so I could go and get her…I questioned if it was too soon and if “she” (I???) was ready for this…

She didn’t make a peep.

Josh finally came home around 10 p.m. and I “surprised” him with an empty bed. He asked if I was ok… I lied and said yes. :)

I refrained myself from going downstairs and pulling her out of her bed and putting her into mine…

I admit it was super nice to sleep back in my normal spot…curled up against Josh, and it was nice to have our room all to ourselves. But I sure did miss having Belane there too!

She slept all night and woke up smiling…proud of herself even for sleeping in her bed. Last night was more of the same…went to bed happy, slept all night without a peep and woke up happy. It’s hard to argue the fact that she was very ready for this, even if I maybe wasn’t quite…

I am thrilled she is so happy and settled that she can sleep in her new room peacefully. It is amazing to think that this little girl who once clung fiercely to me at night and woke up in a panic if I wasn’t within an arm’s reach now says “good night” with a smile as I walk out of her room. I know that it is a really good thing. I am proud of her.

And I’ll be fine… (sniff…sniff).