Usually when I write on this blog about transracial parenting, I am looking at and addressing transracial adoption issues from the viewpoint of a white adoptive parent with Asian and black children. That is because that is my reality, and because most often when we hear about transracial adoption, it is referring to white parents adopting Asian, Hispanic, black or other non-white children.

Today, thanks to a reader, I have a really cool article to share about "typical" transracial adoption in reverse. This article, titled, "Love is Colorblind", which was recently featured in the Detroit News, tells the story of a white girl who was adopted by a black family.

While I am not a big fan of the title of the article, and strongly urge transracial adoptive parent to be "color aware" instead of "colorblind", (see links below for more information on why I feel that way), I think that the article itself is a good one, and the story is a great one.

Stacey Bush was adopted at the age of 10 in 1997 by Regina Bush, a black woman, after living on the streets with her schizophrenic birthmother and in multiple foster homes, and suffering much abuse, neglect and changes in caregivers.

Regina came to be interested in adopting Stacey because she was in the process of adopting Stacey's biracial sister, and she wanted to keep the sisters together. Regina did not care at all that Stacey was white.

The process was not easy. Regina had to go through psychological exams, 10 hours of monitoring by a social worker and filing a federal lawsuit before she was able to adopt Stacey.

As I read all of that, I couldn't help but think how relatively little white parents have to go through to adopt a black child. Sure, we take some pre-adoption education, read some books and convince our social workers during the homestudy process that we have what it takes, but it all is pretty routine now in most situations.

Of course 10 years ago all transracial adoptions were more difficult, but I still can't help but wonder what it would be like today for a black family that wanted to adopt a white child. I would hope that there would not be a double-standard, and yet fear that there would be.

The article shows how successful growing up in the Bush family has been for Stacey. She has excelled in school, works hard and is an active volunteer in her community. Best of all, she describes herself as happy and successful.

From the Detroit News article:

Instead of being hampered by a lifetime of difficulty, she used it to spur herself on. She wanted to prove wrong all the people who had given up on her.

"I want to show people I'm successful," she said. "Not money successful, but love-strength-happiness successful."

She credits her mom, a tough disciplinarian who teaches her children to stand up for themselves.

The article also discusses the feelings of those who oppose transracial adoption of all kinds.

From the article:

The National Association of Black Social Workers, which has opposed biracial adoptions for 35 years, once likened it to "cultural genocide," and said it's important for children to grow up in their own culture.

"Culture is the bridge that links the present with the past, and the past with the future," according to the Washington, D.C., group's policy statement on biracial adoption. "It is a person's values, beliefs, learnings, practices and understandings."

I do not disagree with the statement about the importance of culture. And yet, when you look at the story of Stacey, who had been through so much hurt, pain and loss, and was able to find love, safety, confidence, security, happiness and success in her adoptive family, the color and culture of that family seems to matter much less than their desire and ability to love and parent Stacey, who had no one else.

Stacey admits in the article that there has been challenges in her life being a white girl in a black family, and yet the article clearly shows that she is happy and thriving despite the challenges.

I believe it is the same with my family. I know that my kids who were adopted transracially will face extra challenges because they are being raised by white parents. I know that it would have been ideal if they had been able to stay in their birth families, countries or cultures and that their cultures are an important part of who they are. And yet I also know that in the realities of their lives, being adopted by us was their very best chance at finding the "love-strength-happiness-successful" that Stacey was able to find in her transracial family.

Culture is important. Color does matter. But so do a lot of other things, such as love, safety, security, permanency, belonging, home and family.

More reading on transracial parenting and "colorblindness" -

Mistakes in Transracial Parenting

Does Color Matter?

Great Podcast on Transracial Adoption