The Washington Post had an article last week titled “The Young Apprentice” that highlights an African American couple who are raising their son in the United States. In the article the parents share their fears and their concerns about their son growing up to be a black man in the United States, and the ways that they were striving to prepare him for the realities that were inevitable as he grew older.

The parents talk about how life was for them as children and then as they grew up, and when and how they first felt racism in their lives. They talk about what they want their son to know and how they want him to succeed. His mom says in the article that she wants to fill him full of skills and confidence so that when he is out in the world, despite the fact that he will be a black man, he will be wanted in society and not pushed to the side.

What I really got from reading this article was different from what I expected. When I first found the article part of me thought I was going to get some secret tips on how to successfully raise a little black boy to grow up to be a successful black man. But what I really learned, was that the black parents do not have all of the answers either. These parents were doing what all parents do…the best they can to help raise a child with a good self esteem and the confidence and skills they need to be successful in this world.

The black parents from the article (and all black parents) do have the “advantage” of having dealt with racism in their own lives, and yet they still shared the same concerns that I have heard from parents who have transracially adopted their black children. How do you protect innocence and prepare for racism at the same time? How do you teach children about racism and prepare them for it without making them paranoid about it? It seems that parents of black children, no matter what race the parents are, all share the same concerns about our children growing up in a society that still suffers from racism. We all must do our best to educate ourselves and do all we can to help our children find a way to thrive, succeed and live to their fullest potential, despite the color of their skin.

The “progress” between the father’s life as a child and his son’s was also striking. The father grew up in a segregated black neighborhood, and never even interacted with whites until late in high school. The son attends a school where he is the only black child, and he enjoys schools and his friends and understands that people come in all different colors and doesn’t see that as a “big deal”.

I hope other parents of transracial families find this article interesting and I’d love to know what you “get” from it.