In my last post I started discussing the fact that most of the children awaiting adoption are not young, healthy infants, while at the same time the majority of adoptive parents desire to adopt young, healthy infants. While I do not judge parents adopting babies (and have adopted babies myself), in my next few posts I am going to advocate for, and discuss some of the benefits to adopting children of different ages and special needs children.

Today I am writing about toddlers. Toddlers are interesting people, and despite their challenges, are some of my most favorite people. It is definitely my favorite age to parent. They are still babies in many ways and yet at the same time they are finding some independence and transitioning into a child. They are mastering new skills constantly. They are developing strong personalities, including likes, dislikes, habits and senses of humor.

Watching a toddler explore the world around them and to watch them learn and try new things is a wonderful thing.

Some adoptive parents fall into the trap of thinking that adopting a toddler is simply adopting "an older baby", however this is not accurate and believing that can be setting yourself up for trouble. Many experts consider toddler adoption one of the most challenging ages for adoptive parents, because much like teenagers, toddlers are in a very "transitional" stage of development, and one in which they are clingy fiercely to a parent one moment and pushing away with equal force the next.

I have written a great deal about the challenges of adopting toddlers and offered many tips on promoting attachment and surviving the adjustment period with a new toddler (which I cannot wait to be in the throes of again!). See my links below for more of those posts. In this post however, I am going to share the benefits to adopting a toddler (who I consider to be a child roughly over the age of 12 months and under the age of four years).

While toddlers can no doubt be a handful, they are typically less needy than infants in regards to needing to eat around the clock and not being able to sleep through the night. While many toddlers do have their sleeping and eating schedules disrupted after adoption, they are developmentally able to sleep all night. (In both of our toddler adoptions, our kids were going to bed on their own and sleeping all night without waking within six months of coming home).

Another practical benefit to toddlers is that they are able to be potty trained, and all parents know that being able to say, "bye bye diapers!" is a very good thing.

Toddlers are so much fun! Toddlers can play and interact with you, much more so than babies can. They can be distracted easily with all sorts of simple games and toys. They love to learn new things and practice new skills. They love songs and dance and encourage parents to engage in fun and silliness. There is much that parents can do with a toddler to facilitate bonding and attachment, as toddlers can love to be rocked and cuddled one minute and then want to play tag the next.

When it comes to sibling bonding, toddlers can be a great deal of fun for older siblings, and toddlers usually end up adoring their older siblings. While a new baby in the family can often be anticlimatic for older siblings because babies don't do much beyond eating, sleeping and crying in their early days, toddlers can play ball and play chase and engage and start bonding with the new siblings, and becoming one of the family, right away.

For busy families, toddlers often fit in well.

For those adoptive parents who understand that toddlers are much more than just "big babies", and can understand and even enjoy the unique challenges and blessings to parenting children in this age range, the blessings and rewards can be huge. Many adoption agencies and programs have toddlers waiting for no reason other than they are not infants.

We are on our third toddler adoption and as I have said, toddlers are probably my favorite age. We can't wait to have Solomon running around with the rest of us. :)



Here is a post with lots of resources in it for those considering adopting a toddler.


*If you have not yet participated, make sure you visit this post and enter the fun giveaway for National Adoption Month thanks to Curls.