In my last post, I discussed the fear of being scammed in adoption. The reality is that adoptive parents are vulnerable people, and orphaned children are also highly vulnerable. There is a lot of money involved in adoption. It is easy to see, if you take a step back, how easily someone could take advantage of such a situation for the sake of money.

It is easy to think that all people working in adoption are in it for the children, and truly want to help orphans find families. It is easy to think that all adoption agencies and the people working in them are full of good works and good intentions, and yet, that is a false assumption. There are many people working in adoption with good and honest intentions, and there are also many out there just trying to make a buck.

This news article from the Star Tribune titled “Broken Promises” is a perfect example of how wrong things can go with an unscrupulous agency/program. In a nutshell, a family signed up with an agency (they heard of through a relative), did some minimal research and fell in love with a child. They turned over large amounts of money, got to meet and bond with the child, and now many never get to bring him home. They have been told that they will not get any of their thousands of dollars back. They are heart-broken.

This is every adoptive parent’s worth nightmare, and is the kind of story that can really scare off a lot of potential adoptive parents.

The good news is, that these situations can be avoided with a little bit of work on your part.

So how do you protect yourself from this type of situation? I think some of the very best advice came from an adoption professional quoted in the article.

From “Broken Promises”…

Kris Huson of the Children's Home Society and Family Services said that as emotional as adoption is, prospective parents must lead with their heads -- not their hearts.

It can be so easy to fall in love with a picture of a beautiful child or a fancy adoption agency website making all sorts of promises, but it is SO important to make smart decisions when you are choosing an agency and a program. Remember that there are millions of orphans out there, and oodles of agencies. The agency you choose to work with will determine the success (or lack there of) of your adoption, and is not a decision to be made quickly or rashly.

It is your right as an adoptive parents, as well as your responsibility, to go into your adoption well-educated and confident that you have chosen your agency wisely.

See my next post for more tips on avoiding adoption scams and unscrupulous agencies.